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A porteno once told me that Argentina’s relationship with Uruguay, its neighbor to the east, is something like the States’ relationship with Canada. They’re old friends who mostly get on well, though Argentina is sometimes accused of being dismissive of Uruguay, whose entire population is perhaps a third that of greater Buenos Aires. Funny thing is, all the portenos I know love Montevideo — Uruguay’s capital city and the southernmost capital in all of the Americas — while most of the expats I know think it’s dull. I decided to see for myself. It’s an easy trip from Buenos Aires — you can either take an hour-long boat ride to Colonia, Uruguay, and then board a bus that will take you 2.5 hours to Montevideo, or you can hop a boat direct to the city’s port and save 30 minutes. Riding the bus through the city around 11 on a Thursday night, I was immediately struck by the lack of people. Buenos Aires is bustling at that time, its sidewalks lined with pedestrians and its streets filled with cabs and buses. Here, all was quiet. And it remained relatively quiet throughout the two days I was there. I found some hustle and bustle in the city center and in the Mercado del Puerto, where tourists and locals eat at one of the half-dozen or so parillas (grills) that send up an eye-stinging haze of smoke. But on Saturday as I walked in search of a feria I’d heard about, I sometimes went blocks without passing anyone. Montevideo is more run-down than Buenos Aires, particularly in the old city. But it’s home to some beautiful historic buildings, including the restored Teatro Solis, where I saw a production of a very strange Calderon play. And it’s also home to a little museum dedicated to the artist Torres Garcia, a Uruguayan member of the avant-garde given to primary colors and blocky designs (though he painted portraits and such as well). You’ll see his work reproduced all over the country. I understand why some people find Montevideo dull, especially after Buenos Aires. And I can also understand why portenos like it — sometimes you need a break from all the busyness. Montevideo is in many ways more beautiful than Buenos Aires, thanks to all the water. It’s surrounded on three sides by the Rio de la Plata, which a little further north merges with the Atlantic. In narrower spots, you can look down sidestreets to your left and right and see the river. And it’s not the ugly brown water you see in Buenos Aires, either. It reminds me a little of one of the Great Lakes. I’d love to go back on a hot, sunny day and sit on the deck of one of the riverfront restaurants, eating fresh fish and sipping medio y medio (their blend of sparkling and white wines). I’m sure I wouldn’t be bored at all.

There were 3 nuns in the church 2 were crying 1 was laughing the preist walked up 2 a crying 1 and said ‘why are u crying’ the nun said i killed some 1 ,the priest said go drink from the holy water so he went up 2 the 2nd crying nun and said why are u crying she said’ i stole a car’ and he told her to drink from the holy water 2 then went up 2 the laughing nun and said why are u laughing she said’ i peed in the holy water’

A young executive was leaving the office late one evening when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand. “Listen,” said the CEO, “this is a very sensitive and important document here, and my secretary has gone for the night. Can you make this thing work?” “Certainly,” said the young executive. He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button. “Excellent, excellent!” said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the machine. “I just need one copy.”